Kristina stripping

...the old paint off of our front door. Another project brought to you by Easy Street Remodeling.

New gas range

Since our old oven was off by 50 degrees, we figured we would get a new one. I even switched the shutoff valve and didn't blow up the house.

Pickled Peppers

Trying to make pickled peppers for the first time. We'll see how they taste...

Possible paint choices

Grey beige and Eiffel Tower. They're much warmer in person.

We bought a house and now we're tearing it down.

Congenital Heart Defect Awareness Week

Did you know that 1 in 100 children are born with a congenital heart defect? It is the most common birth defect, and a leading cause of birth-defect related deaths worldwide. Sadly, our Matilda is one of these, as is my cousin Sabina, daughter of my dad's brother Rune and his wife Linda, who died at the age of three months 22 years ago. 

From the above website:

Congenital Heart Disease is considered to be the most common birth defect, and is a leading cause of birth-defect related deaths worldwide.

Despite the fact that CHD affects approximately 1.8 millions families in the U.S.,  a relatively small amount of funding is currently available for parent/patient educational services, research, and support.

By sharing our experiences and providing information, we hope to raise public awareness about conditions that affect approximately 40,000 babies each year in the United States alone.

It is our sincere hope that efforts to educate the public will result in improved early diagnosis, additional funding for support and educational services, scientific research, and access to quality of care for our children and adults.

Our third child

Den 29 december, på Matildas 11 månaders dag, fick vi reda på att vi skulle få en baby till i början av september. Vi gladde oss mycket, trots att det också ledde till att vi saknade Matilda ännu mer. Den 24 januari, i början av vecka 8, var vi på första ultraljudsundersökningen. Den visade att babyn var liten, ca 6 veckor, och man såg inga hjärtslag, trots att man ofta börjar se det kring sjätte veckan. Det fanns dock ett litet hopp om att vi hade fel datum. Vi fick vänta på nytt ultra om tio dagar. Så vi fick gå igenom veckan med Matildas födelsedag och dödsdag utan att veta hur det var med den nya babyn, vilket förstås gjorde de dagarna ännu tyngre. I tisdags var vi på ultra igen och tyvärr fanns det ingen förändring. Vår baby hade dött vid ca 6 veckors ålder. Så igår, på årsdagen av Matildas begravning, var jag inne för operation. Eftersom det är för tidigt att kunna veta könet på babyn, har vi bestämt oss att kalla det Jesse, ett namn som passar för både pojkar och flickor. 

Vi är tillbaka i den djupa gropen, som vi så sakta hade börjat ta oss upp ur. Sorgen är förstås annorlunda, eftersom vi fick behålla Jesse så liten stund, men tidpunkten gör det mycket värre. Det känns så grymt att det ska behöva ske nu. Det här livet är verkligen en vandring genom dödsskuggans dal just nu och jag är tacksam över att jag inte behöver göra det ensam. Weslie och jag håller hårt om varandra, stapplar sakta fram tillsammans och lyfter upp varandra när vi faller. När ska sorgens dimma lätta för oss? Vi är tacksamma för Edith, som kan lysa upp även den svartaste dag, och för all kärlek från familj, vänner och församlingsmedlemmar, men vi längtar efter dagen då Jesus tar oss hem, då tårarna torkas bort och vi får se våra barn igen.

On December 29th, Matilda's 11 month birthday, we found out that we were expecting another baby, due early September. Four weeks later in week 8, on Jan 24th, we had the first ultrasound. It showed that the baby was small, about six weeks and there was no heartbeat, which usually is seen around this time. We had to wait for ten days for a new ultrasound. So we went through the week of Matilda's birthday and the anniversary of her death, not knowing how this baby was doing, which of course made it much harder. On Tuesday we had the second ultrasound, which showed no change. Our baby had died in the womb around six weeks. Yesterday, exactly a year since Matilda's funeral, I had surgery. Since it's too early to know the gender, we have decided to name the baby Jesse.

We are back in the deep pit of grief, which we had slowly started climbing out of. The grief is of course a bit different, since we got to keep little Jesse for such a short while, but the timing makes it much worse. Our lives are truly a walk through the valley of death right now and I'm thankful I don't have to do this by myself. Weslie and I hold on to each other, stumbling together and lifting each other up when we fall. When will this fog of grief disappear? We are thankful for Edith, who can brighten even the darkest day, and for all the love from family, friends and members at Grace, but we long for the day when Jesus takes us home, when our tears are wiped away and we get to see our babies again.

Snow in Texas

In the past 6 hours or so we've gotten 6-8" of snow in Burkburnett. Edith was very excited to get out in it:

Momma and Edith building a snowman:

From Finland ?!?

The finished product:

Snow angels:

Red cheeks back inside:

Warming tootsies at the fireplace: